Welcome to Mumfection mom of the week where I feature an incredible mom for all of you to get to know! I am so excited to be doing this and the best part is it will be a weekly feature, so if you want to get in on it feel free to e-mail me @ email@example.com! I will be more than happy to feature you!!
In 2013 I started my 10th year publishing content online. I took the plunge, initially; inspired by the idea that everyone has the right to have their ideas heard. My passions focus on building community, celebrating diversity & encouraging families to enjoy life in beautiful BC.
1. Give us a play by play of a regular day at your house…
We have been eating from the Paleo food plan for a few months now, so preparation for meal times and eating is a big focus for our day. Some days we go to a scheduled event for the children. It could be Strong Start, a visit to the library or a class like swimming. We also like to get outside every day. Sometimes this includes a walk in a local park, a drive to a neighboring area to walk or a few hours in the yard gardening and playing. I try to include opportunities to be with the children trying out a new or repeated challenge. It might be inspired by the Montessori preschool curriculum or something else that we are looking at. We read books during the day and – like most families – we have an evening routine after dinner that includes reading a story and poems from a poem book. We often sing songs as well. When my parents are visiting from Vancouver Islands the routine changes completely. We’re not so inflexible that we can’t deviate if we have to.
2. How has being a mother changed your view of life?
Before I became a mother I was a Montessori directress (teacher), researcher in the field of education and aunt for 9 years. You get to the point where you think you’ve encountered most circumstances and outlooks. My children have humbled me to understand that there is still so much I don’t yet know.
3. What has been, in your eyes, the biggest reward of motherhood?
It really is hard to choose one big reward. Building a family together with my husband is the biggest one really. As much as I’d love to highlight that I enjoy the times when we’re exchanging big hugs, kisses and adoring looks with each other, I also love the times when I can sneak a peak at my husband sharing time with the children and sharing his own unique style and perspectives.
4. What has been, in your eyes, the hardest struggle of motherhood?
The hardest struggle has been the tendency to rate my mothering efforts poorly based on my experience as a Montessori directress (teacher). Being a directress in the classroom is a different dynamic than being at home full time with twins. This tendency creeps up whenever I see blog posts by other mums of young children who are or have worked as teachers of young children.
5. In what ways are your children exactly like you?
They pick up the language that I use, my enthusiasm for various topics, my interest in world cultures and my expressions.
6. In no more than a couple sentences give us a description of how you felt throughout your pregnancy/ies…
I was on bed rest for four months and my twins were born three weeks early. In the months preceding my premature departure from my job I experienced a lot of twinges and pressure. It was hard to walk and take public transit to work. Twins are known to make early entrances and I was concerned that this wouldn’t happen. There was a heat wave during the spring and summer that I was pregnant so it was tough going.
7. How to do you measure a parent’s success in this world? Do you think you measure up to your own expectations?
This is a difficult question because it’s hard to know how to rate success in life in general. For me if I can have days when my children get lots of hugs and kisses and they see tangible evidence that they are loved I feel it’s been a good day. If we eat healthy meals, get outside and have the opportunity to be with others and experience meaningful learning opportunities along the way – even better.
8. What are some of the lessons you have learned from your own parents about parenting?
My parents were strict in some ways and quite permissive in others. My father was very attentive to details and thought through issues with care. My mum was very organized about running our family life and took a lot of care in how she fed, clothed and looked after us. Both parents made it a priority to provide us with opportunities that they could only dream about as children. They kept high standards and still do as grandparents.
* If I didn’t answer this question I think it would be a bit sad. Especially since I’m an alumna of a women and leadership programme put on by the Minerva Foundation! I think my strengths are that I try to stay calm with my children and not raise my voice. I try to talk with them a lot and be present with them – not off somewhere checking social media updates. (I group most of that activity in the hours after they go to bed.)
10. How do you battle “parent guilt” on a daily basis? What advice would you give to others?
You have to be very fierce with yourself on this topic. The best remedy is to have a fix that really resets yourself. For example, if you really feel that a day has not been productive – not even as a “let’s lie down and do nothing while looking at clouds” day – you can always do something that balances that out. For example, it might mean blitzing around your main living spaces and putting everything away. You’ll look around at how tidy your space looks and feel that you’ve accomplished something. If you’re feeling hard on yourself about how you’re raising your children stop, read a story with them, take time to chat and share some hugs. You’ll find that your guilty feeling will dissipate.
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